Leaderboard

Old Curse An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you." The old man says without hesitation - "I now pronounce you man and wife."

Frog Noise A six year old goes to the hospital with his grandma to visit his grandpa. When they get to the hospital, he runs ahead of his grandma and bursts into his grampa's room. "Grampa, Grampa," he says excitedly, "as soon as grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog!" "What?" said his grandpa. "Make a noise like a frog because grandma said that as soon as you croaked, we're going to Disneyland!!!"

New Burns A woman is in the hospital and just had twins, a boy and a girl. But no one is there with her except her brother. The nurse comes into the room after the delivery and says, “your brother has taken the liberty to name the children." The new mother says, “OH no. he probably gave them stupid names." The nurse says, “The girls name is denise." The mother says, “That’s not bad, I like it. And the boys?" The nurse says, “The boys name is De-nephew."