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Showing content with the highest reputation on 03/13/2019 in Posts

  1. 1 point
    Blind cashier at Cabalas Shop A woman goes into Cabela's to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get, so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. The clerk was standing behind the counter wearing dark shades. She says to him, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?" He says, ?"Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything from the sound it makes." She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway...... He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. Test line. It's a good all-around combination, and it's on sale this week for only $30.00." She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. "Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says. She bends down to pick it up and accidentally farts. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes......there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was her who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around? The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please." The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me the rod and reel were on sale for $30.00? How did you get $34.50?" He replies, "Yes, ma'am. The rod and reel are only $30.00, but the Duck Call is $4.50.
  2. 1 point
    No Sh*t: People Are Overdosing on Anti-Diarrhea Medicine While Trying to Get High The opioid epidemic is one of the most terrifying scourges to ever sink its lunatic fangs into the soul of America. Not only is it responsible for killing off more people annually than the entirety of the 19-year Vietnam War, but it has also found a way to turn everyday, working-class citizens into full-blown specimens of depravity—there are now in upwards of 2 million people addicted to opioids in the United States. Some have no trouble securing a steady stream of pain pills from their friendly neighborhood physicians while others are left to score dope in the streets like rats. Although this might not sound like a tough task, especially given the prevalence of opioids in this country, tracking these drugs down on the black market isn’t always easy to do. It is conceivable that an addict without a stable dope connection (or enough money to buy it) could go days or even weeks without the necessary dose to keep them on the nod. This is when the disease goes dark, a time when junk sickness sets in, pressuring even the most socially acceptable, well put-together drug addict to take drastic measures to survive the dry spell. For some—presumably the most desperate of the breed—this means heading down to their local pharmacies, where they are buying up boxes of the popular anti-diarrhea drug Imodium. It seems that word has gotten around that this over-the-counter medication contains a mild opioid called loperamide. Although this drug, which is sometimes referred to as “the poor man’s methadone,” does not provide the user with a high anywhere close to potent prescription narcotics like Lortab or Oxycontin, it can trick the brain enough to ease the worst of the withdrawal symptoms. These symptoms can range from a variety of flu-like demons including muscle aches, nausea, anxiety, and cold chills. However, a new study from Rutgers University shows that antidiarrheal medications are also causing an increasing number of people to suffer fatal overdoses. No shit! Lead study author Diane Calello, executive and medical director of the New Jersey Poison Control Center at Rutgers University Medical School, says Imodium “is a safe and effective treatment for diarrhea, but when misused in large doses, it is more toxic to the heart than other opioids.” Because of how this drug reacts in the body, overdoses that happen as a result of Imodium cannot be undone through emergency treatments like Narcan. These life-saving drugs, which are typically carried around by first responders, can only reverse opioid mishaps resulting in respiratory failure. “Overdose deaths occur not because patients stop breathing, as with other opioids, but due to irregular heartbeat and cardiac arrest,” Calello added. Most of the problem seems to stem from a lack of available and affordable treatments for opioid addiction. The study, which was published in the journal Clinical Toxicology, finds that the majority of the people abusing Imodium to the point of overdose were simply searching for a trapdoor out of their addict daze. However, the study finds some people are apparently using the drug in massive enough doses to provide them with the same feel-good effects as fentanyl and heroin. It’s a desperate situation and one that is getting worse with each passing year. Imodium is now America’s favorite “opioid alternative” according to a report from Pharmacy Times. In fact, the number of overdoses related to Imodium has increased 91 percent since 2010. “Consumers need to understand the very real danger of taking this medication in excessive doses,” Calello said. Although many hardcore opioid users argue that marijuana is no substitute for painkillers, there is significant evidence that the herb has helped many addicts get clean. A recent study from the University of Michigan shows nearly 40 percent of medical marijuana users were able to cut back on the use of prescription painkillers. A large percentage were even able to get off opioids altogether. Marijuana may not be a perfect plan for pulling opioid junkies out of the grips of addiction but it is undoubtedly better than relying on antidiarrheal medications that have been known to bring about fatal heart attacks. Life is hard enough as it is. Let’s save the Imodium for those mornings when 15 beers and a late-night Taco Bell run won’t let you get off the crapper long enough to get dressed for work.
  3. 1 point
    You know you're an ENGINEER when..... The only jokes you receive are through e-mail At Christmas, it goes without saying that you will be the one to find the burnt-out bulb in the string Buying flowers for your girlfriend or spending the money to upgrade your RAM is a moral dilemma Everyone else on the Alaskan cruise is on deck peering at the scenery, and you are still on a personal tour of the engine room In college you thought Spring Break was a metal fatigue failure The salespeople at consumer electronics retail can't answer any of your questions You are always late to meetings You are at an air show and know how fast the skydivers are falling You bought your wife a new robotic vacuum cleaner and mop for her birthday You can quote scenes from any Monty Python movie You can type 70 words a minute but can't read your own handwriting You can't write unless the paper has both horizontal and vertical lines. You comment to your wife that her straight hair is nice and parallel. You forgot to get a haircut ... for 6 months. You go on the rides at Disneyland and sit backwards in the chairs to see how they do the special effects. You have ever saved the power cord and screws from a broken appliance. You have more friends on the Internet than in real life. You have never bought any new underwear or socks for yourself since you got married. You have used coat hangers and duct tape for something other than hanging coats and taping ducts. You know what http:// actually stands for. You look forward to Christmas only to put together the kids' toys. You own one or more white short-sleeve dress shirts. You see a good design and still have to change it. You spent more on your calculator than on your wedding ring. You still own a slide rule and you know how to work it. You think that when people around you yawn, it's because they didn't get enough sleep. You wear black socks with white tennis shoes (or vice versa). You're in the back seat of your car, she's looking wistfully at the moon, and you're trying to locate a geosynchronous satellite. Your laptop computer costs more than your car. Your wife hasn't the foggiest idea what you do at work. Your smartphone is millions of times more powerful than all of NASA’s combined computing in 1969 You've already calculated how much you make per second. You've ever tried to repair a $5 radio.
  4. 1 point
    https://www.file-upload.com/kyfox0sh9xp0 https://userscloud.com/npc0yozetpjp
  5. 0 points
    HP Expands Laptop Battery Recall Amidst Injury Reports These are the products that are currently affected: HP ProBooks (64x G2 and G3 series, 65x G2 and G3 series, 4xx G4 series) HPx360 (310 G2) HP Pavilion x360 11inch Notebook PC HP 11 Notebook PC HP ZBook (17 G3, and Studio G3) mobile workstations. The batteries were also sold as accessories or replacement batteries for the HP ZBook Studio G4 mobile workstation, HP ProBook 4xx G5 series, HP ENVY 15, HP Mobile Thin Clients (mt21, mt22, and mt31), or for any of the products listed above. While HP initially expanded its recall in January, the U.S. government shutdown prevented the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission from officially discussing it until March 12. The original recall was actually announced January 2018 by the CPSC due to "eight reports of battery packs overheating, melting, or charring, including three reports of property damage totalling $4,500 with one report of a minor injury involving a first degree burn to the hand." Therefore, 50,000 battery units were recalled. Despite that, the CPSC has recently stated that HP received "eight new reports of battery packs in the U.S. overheating, melting, or charring, including one report of minor injury and two reports of property damage totalling $1,100." As a result, the recall now brings us to "about 78,500" units. According to the CPSC, the batteries were "shipped in notebook computers and mobile workstations sold from December 2015 through April 2018 for between $300 and $4,000 and were also sold separately between December 2015 and December 2018 for between $50 and $90." If you have one of the products listed in HP's recall, you can go to this site which will guide you on how to validate your battery and provide you with the next steps to return it.