MKW

I thought it was FARTING until I read your last message

Patient Parents

your 'flag girl' also has a cute a**

what an artistic child - love the last one.

odd looking tree

AWESOME! favorite one: There are two kinds of people who don't say much: those who are quiet and those who talk a lot.

I resent this thread - this Granny DOES NOT USE IE due to being a GEEK

I really have no memory of JFK using that last quote...LOL!

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!! that is great! thanks for the laugh.

Cyberwarez on sale??? had I know I would still have bought at the regular price..LOL!

I love the third section - and even after 2 beers I could pronounce all the words P.S. my limit is 2 beers

cute!

I must have alot more 'male' in me than 'female' - it would take me 10 minutes because I would look at how the jeans were made and if the seams were straight before I bought anything.

hummmmmmmmmmmm...

Grandchildren

"Gentlemen may prefer blondes, but it takes a real man to handle a redhead." please note: I am a natural redhead so I can post these which I find mostly true! Q. What do you call a redhead with an attitude? A. Normal. Q. What do redheads make for dinner? A. Reservations. Q. Why do guys date blondes? A. All the redheads are taken. Q. How can you tell when a redhead has been using a finicky computer? A. There's a hammer embedded in the computer monitor. Q. Why aren't there more redhead jokes? A. Someone made the mistake of telling them to a redhead. Q. What is the difference between a redhead and a terrorist? A. You can negotiate with a terrorist. Q. How do you get a redhead to argue with you? A. Say something... Q. What’s safer: a redhead or a piranha? A. The piranha. They only attack in schools. Q. Why do redheads really like their hair color? A. It does the same thing for the men it does for the bulls. Q. Why didn't Indians scalp redheads? A. They knew better. Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A. A redhead. Q. How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you? A. She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl. Q. How many redheads does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. One -- she holds the bulb while the world revolves around her. Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a barracuda? A. Nail polish. Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a pit bull? A. The pantsuit. Q. What's black-and-blue and lies on the sidewalk? A. A guy who tells too many redheaded jokes. Q. Why is it better to date a blonde than a redhead? A. You can ignore a blonde safely. Q. How do you remember a redhead's birthday? A. Forget it once. Q. How is a redhead like a tennis racquet? A. They're both high-strung. Q. What do redheads and razor-wire have in common? A. Handle both with care. Seen inscribed on a tombstone: "Beneath this stone lies the guy who told that last bad redhead joke." Redheads are just blondes with high blood pressure. Only two things are necessary to keep a redhead happy: One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it. If you love a Redhead, set her free... If she follows you everywhere you go, pitches a tent in your front lawn and puts your new girlfriend in the hospital, she’s yours.

You Must Be A Redneck If ... * You recycle your own toilet paper * Your mom has to shave more times a month than your dad * You see a bill board that says "Don't do crack" and it reminds you to pull up your pants. * You stare at a carton of orange juice because it says "concentrate." * Your bumper sticker reads: "One more Whore and We Get Gore." * The nativity scene you set up in your yard at Christmas includes two pink flamingos and baby Jesus lying in a painted tire. * Most of your teeth are on a chain around your neck. * You hunt from your bedroom window. * Your dad walks you to school because you're in the same grade. * You refrigerate your food stamps. * You use a 10 penny nail to pick your teeth after a night of road kill. * You have ever dressed your child as a "Snot-rag" for Halloween. * Your idea of a loaded dishwasher is getting your wife drunk. * You and your spouse get divorced and you are still relatives. * You go to your local ice cream store and order Copenhagen "sprinkles" on your cone. * You know instinctively that red wine goes with opossum. * You're always looking to find your Mother-in-Law's picture on the back of a milk carton! * The officer that just pulled you over asks if "you have any I.D."..and you respond "About whut?" * You take a beer to a job interview. * You are caught roll'n your trailer down the street to jump start the heater. * When you finish eatin' your bologna you use the rind for dental floss. * You go to Goodwill to meet women. * You and your friends are putting an engine in a pickup, drinking beer, and the conversation is: Which county jail has the best food!