Mike Is Dead!

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Mike Is Dead!

 

 

Two guys in a bar...

One says "Did your hear the news - Mike is dead!"

" Wooo, what the hell happened to him?"

"Well he was on his way over to my house the other day and when he

arrived outside the house he didn't brake properly and boom - He hit

the

pavement and the car flips up and he crashed through the sunroof - Went

flying through the air and smashed through my upstairs bedroom window."

"What a horrible way to die!"

"No no, he survived that, that didn't kill him at all. So, he's landed

in my upstairs bedroom and he's all covered in broken glass on the

floor. Then, he spots the big old antique wardrobe we have in the room

and reaches up for the handle to try to pull himself up. He's just

dragging himself up when bang, this massive wardrobe comes crashing

down

on top of him, crushing him and breaking most of his bones."

"What a way to go, that's terrible!"

"No no, that didn't kill him he survived that. He managed to get the

wardrobe off him and crawls out onto the landing, he tries to pull

himself up on the banister but under his weight, the banister breaks

and

he goes falling down on to the first floor. In mid air, all the broken

banister poles spin and fall on him, pinning him to the floor,

sticking

right through him."

"Now that is the most unfortunate way to go!"

"No no, that didn't kill him, he even survived that. So he's on the

downstairs landing, just beside the kitchen. He crawls in to the

kitchen, tries to pull himself up on the cooker, but reached for a big

pot of boiling hot water, whoosh, the whole thing came down on him and

burned most of his skin off him."

"Man, what a way to go!"

"No no, he survived that, he survived that ! He's lying on the ground,

covered in boiling water and he spots the phone and tries to pull

himself up, to call for help, but instead he grabs the light switch and

pulls the whole thing off the wall and the water and electricity didn't

mix and so he got electrocuted, wallop, 10,000 volts shot through him."

"Now that is one awful way to go!"

"No no, he survived that, he ..."

"Hold on now, just how the hell did he die?"

"I shot him!"

"You shot him? What the hell did you shoot him for?"

"He was wrecking my fucking house."