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Short Jokes Post – Keep The Jokes Short And Funny

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What do you get when you cross a tiger and a blizzard……Frostbite.

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As Lord Bath's health deteriorated……His family made the difficult decision to pull the plug.

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Most people are shocked……When they find out how bad I am as an electrician.

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What is a cheetahs favourite food……Fast food.

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Never trust atoms……They make up everything.

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What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle……They rose.

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What does “Rockin’ Robin” do when she’s bored……Tweet.

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My seatmate on a flight was a woman. Ever the charmer, I asked, Does the airline charge you extra for sitting next to good-looking men……Yes, she said, but I wasn’t willing to pay.

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Single woman with hand sanitizer would like to meet a single man with toilet rolls for good clean fun.

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What did the dirt say to the rain……Thanks to you, my name is mud.

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What is a cat’s favourite movie……The sound of Mew-sic.

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I’ve been nominated to do 25 push-ups for 25 days challenge……So, I started by blocking the **** who nominated me.

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Why did the nose hate school……It was tired of being picked on.

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I used to be addicted to soap……But I'm clean now.

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How do you row a canoe filled with puppies……Bring out the doggy paddle.

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To limit the spread of any viruses/cross contamination, I’ve been advised to "WASH DOWN ALL SURFACES" in my home that I use……The PC blew up when applied power!

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Have things gone from bad to worse? I just looked at the calendar to see, to my horror, that there's a new virus or something.....March-19...wtf?!?!!

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My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline……She hit the ceiling.

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I was addicted to the hokey pokey……But then I turned myself around.

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What do you get when you cross a caterpillar and a parrot……A walkie talkie.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, Hey……The horse replies, Sure.

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I googled Rorshach test……But for some reason, all that came up were pictures of my parents fighting.

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I tried to win a suntanning competition……But all I got was bronze.

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How much space will be freed in the EU after Brexit……Approximately 1 GB.

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What was the first animal in space……The cow that jumped over the moon.

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