Short Jokes Post – Keep The Jokes Short And Funny

[uk666 5,298]

Wives are magicians........They can change anything into an argument.

[uk666 5,298]

How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male……All they are concerned with are legs, breasts and thighs.

[uk666 5,298]

There are 3 kinds of men in this world: Some remain single and make wonders happen, some have girlfriends and see wonders happen......the rest get married and wonder what happened!

[uk666 5,298]

What’s the difference between a jet engine and a flight attendant……At the end of the flight the jet engine stops whining 

[uk666 5,298]

What is a man's idea of a balanced diet……A Budweiser in each hand! 

[uk666 5,298]

What did the bartender say after a book walked into the bar……"Please, no sad stories!" 

[Old Fart 19]

I am interested in astronomy so I put a skylight in my bedroom.
Man, are people upstairs pissed.

[uk666 5,298]

Poland Crash 

A two-seater Cessna 152 plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland.

Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 200 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening. 

[uk666 5,298]

Why did God invent Jameson whiskey…….So the Irish would never rule the world! 

[uk666 5,298]

Why did Mexicans create tequila……..So ugly people would have a chance at having sex!

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like......Bananas.......The older they get, the less firm they are.

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like.....Bank Machines.......Once they withdraw they lose interest.

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like.....Weather.......Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
 

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like.....Blenders.......You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
 

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like.....Cement......After getting laid, they take a long time to get hard.
 

[uk666 5,298]

Life with a woman is like a pack of cards, you need a heart to love one, you need a diamond to marry one, you need club to beat her, and a spade to bury the her!

[uk666 5,298]

What do rocks and women have in common……..You skip the flat ones!

[uk666 5,298]

A skeleton comes to the doctor……Doctor: You are pretty late!

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like . . . Coffee……The best ones are rich, warm and keep you up all night long.

[uk666 5,298]

Where do fish sleep.......In a river bed
 

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like . . . Bananas…….The older they get, the less firm they are.

[uk666 5,298]

Men are like . . . High Heels……They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.

[uk666 5,298]

What did George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common........They were all born on holidays.

[uk666 5,298]

What is the difference between a fish and a piano........You can’t tuna fish.

[uk666 5,298]

Why you should never tell a joke on ice. while fishing.......The ice will crack up!