uk666 5,298 Report post Posted June 20, 2018 Dog Proverbs 1. Whoever said you can't buy happiness forgot about little puppies. • Gene Hill 2. In dog years, I am dead. • Unknown 3. Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear. • Dave Barry 4. The dog's kennel is not the place to keep a sausage. • Danish Proverb 5. Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. • Groucho Marx. 6. The scientific name for an animal that doesn't either run from or fight its enemies is lunch. • Michael Friedman 7. To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. • Aldous Huxley 8. Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives. • Sue Murphy 9. Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac who stays up all night wondering if there really is a Dog? • Unknown 10. I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers. • Unknown 11. I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves. • August Strindberg 12. No animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation. • Fran Lebowitz 13. Ever consider what they must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul- chicken, pork, half cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth. • Anne Tyler 14. I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. • Rita Rudner 15. My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to 99 cents a can. That's almost $7.00 in dog money. • Joe Weinstein 16. Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant. • Unknown 17. If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons. • James Thurber 18. You enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person with pets. • Nora Ephron 19. Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. • Ann Landers 20. Women and cats will do as they please and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. • Robert A. Heinlein 21. In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him. • Dereke Bruce 22. There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. • Ben Williams 23. When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. • Edward Abbey 24. Cat's Motto: No matter what you've done wrong, always try to make it look like the dog did it. • Unknown 25. No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as the dog does. • Christopher Morley 26. A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself. • Josh Billings 27. Man is a dog's idea of what God should be. • Holbrook Jackson 28. The average dog is a nicer person than the average person is. • Andrew A. Rooney 29. He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion. • Unknown 30. Heaven goes by favour. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. • Mark Twain 31. I care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better for it. • Abraham Lincoln 32. Money will buy a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail. • Josh Billings 33. The best thing about a man is his dog. • French Proverb 34. The reason a dog has so many friends is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue. • Anonymous 35. The dogs came and licked his sores. • Luke 16:2 36. Dogs like to obey. It gives them security. • James Herriot 37. Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative. • Mordecai Siegal 38. It is fatal to let any dog know that he is funny, for he immediately looses his head and starts hamming it up. • P.G. Woodehouse 39. If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went. • Will Rogers 40. Dogs need to sniff the ground; it's how they keep abreast of current events. The ground is a giant dog newspaper, containing all kinds of late-breaking dog news items, which, if they are especially urgent, are often, continued in the next yard. • Dave Barry 41. Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. • Franklin P. Jones 42. If your dog is fat, you aren't getting enough exercise. • Unknown 43. I wonder what goes through his mind when he sees us peeing in his water bowl. • Penny Ward Moser 44. A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. • Robert Benchley 45. We give dog’s time we can spare, space we can spare and love we can spare. In return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made. • M. Facklam Share this post Link to post Share on other sites