uk666 5,298 Report post Posted November 9, 2018 Sex Statements When I was born, I was given a choice - a big pecker or a good memory.... I don't remember what I chose. Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory. A wife is a sex object. Every time you ask for sex, she objects. Impotence: nature's way of saying, "No hard feelings..." There are only two four letter words that are offensive to men - 'don't' and 'stop'......unless they are used together. Panties: Not the best thing on earth, but next to the best thing on earth. There are three stages in a man's life: Tri-Weekly, Try Weekly and Try Weakly. Virginity is not dignity, it's lack of opportunity. Having sex is like playing bridge - if you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand. Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy. Question: What's an Australian kiss? Answer: The same thing as a French kiss, only down under. A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the Hole. She was happy with the Thing. Question: What are the three biggest tragedies in a man's life? Answer: Life sucks, job sucks and . . . . the wife doesn't ! Question: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Answer: Breasts don't have eyes. Despite the old saying, 'Don't take your troubles to bed', many men still sleep with their wives! 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rædwulf 1,441 Report post Posted November 9, 2018 wow.. i truly don't have a favorite.. they were all bloody hilarious.. hahaha.. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
