uk666 5,298 Report post Posted May 25, 2019 Golf Wisdom 2 Golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture. — Winston Churchill Give me the fresh air, a beautiful partner, and a nice round of golf, and you can keep the fresh air and the round of golf. — Jack Benny You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work. — Lee Trevino Golf is not a game, it’s bondage. It was obviously devised by a man torn with guilt, eager to atone for his sins. — Unknown It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course. — Hank Aaron Columbus went around the world in 1492. That isn’t a lot of strokes when you consider the course. — Lee Trevino I’m not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they’d come up sliced. — Lee Trevino These greens are so fast I have to hold my putter over the ball and hit it with the shadow. — Sam Snead Golf is a game in which you yell “fore,” shoot six, and write down five. — Paul Harvey They throw their clubs backwards and sideways, and that’s wrong. You should always throw a club ahead of you so that you don’t have to walk any extra distance to get it. — Tommy Bolt Putting allows the touchy golfer two to four opportunities to blow a gasket in the short space of two to forty feet. — Tommy Bolt Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at. — Jimmy Demaret If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. — Jack Lemmon If you’re caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron. — Lee Trevino Fifty years ago, 100 white men chasing one black man across a field was called the Ku Klux Klan. Today it’s called the PGA Tour. — Unknown Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. — John Updike The people who gave us golf and called it a game are the same people who gave us bag pipes and called it music. — Silk Stockings TV show I would like to deny all allegations by Bob Hope that during my last game of golf, I hit an eagle, a birdie, an elk and a moose. — Gerald Ford The least thing upsets him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of butterflies in the adjoining meadows. — P. G. Wodehouse If I’m on the course and lightning starts, I get inside fast. If God wants to play through, let him. — Bob Hope In baseball you hit your home run over the right-field fence, the left-field fence, the centre-field fence. Nobody cares. In golf everything has got to be right over second base. — Ken Harrelson The first time I played the Masters, I was so nervous I drank a bottle of rum before I teed off. I shot the happiest 83 of my life. — Chi Chi Rodriguez After all these years, it’s still embarrassing for me to play on the American golf tour. Like the time I asked my caddie for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later with a ham on rye. — Chi Chi Rodriguez 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
