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An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.

A cat died and went to Heaven. God met her at the gates and said, 'You have been a good cat all these years. Anything you want is yours for the asking.' The cat thought for a minute and then said... 'All my life I lived on a farm and slept on hard wooden floors. I would like a real fluffy pillow to sleep on.' God said, 'Say no more.' Instantly the cat had a huge fluffy pillow. A few days later, six mice were killed in an accident and they all went to Heaven together. God met the mice at the gates with the same offer that He made to the cat. The mice said, 'Well, we have had to run all of our lives: from cats, dogs, and even people with brooms! If we could just have some little roller skates, we would not have to run again.' God answered, 'It is done.' All the mice had beautiful roller skates. About a week later, God decided to check on the cat. He found her sound asleep on her fluffy pillow.. God gently awakened the cat and asked, 'Is everything okay? How have you been doing? Are you happy?' The cat replied, 'Oh, it is Wonderful. I have never been so happy in my life. The pillow is so fluffy, and those little Meals on Wheels you have been sending over are delicious!'

Thank you...

I'd like soem of what he smokes...

Got 'em - thank you...

Thank you to all the staff and members for making this forum a wonderful place... May all members have good health for the New Year...

Those were so-o entertaining... A lot of good smiles... thanks...

...I introduced myself and said Hello on the Forum..! Just wanted to say Hi to all Admins, Mods and members and say thanks for making this such a nice Forum..! I'm an old retired Canadian and have better than avg. knowledge of computers but can get into trouble now and then... Grin... Been retired for 14 years now and also beong to 3 other forums (1 as an Admin and 1 as a Mod)..! Hobbies are Amateur Radio, Computers, Billairds, Golf and my grand-children... Probably in reverse order for impaortance... That's me..! !

Too funny....

I'll have tto try this - Thanks friend...

ZuShiKiKaTo