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uk666

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  1. uk666

    Three Morals

    Three Morals A bird was flying south for the winter, but had left it too late to set off and found itself frozen solid in a blizzard. It dropped to earth in a field of cows, landing in a massive cow pat, just as it was being deposited by the fattest cow in the field. At first, the bird was disgusted until it realized that the pile of poop was actually thawing him out. As the ice melted and his feathers returned to normal, he tweeted joyously, but the sounds were heard by a nearby cat who promptly crept over and ate the bird. There are three morals to this story: Not everyone who gets you into shit is your enemy. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend. If you are in shit, keep your mouth shut.
  2. A Tight Spot Puzzle This puzzle is often given to students to teach them about creative thinking (i.e. thinking outside the box). Imagine yourself in a room without windows or doors (there is still light in the room so you are able to see). In the centre of the room is a twelve-inch tube solidly embedded six inches deep in a cement floor. At the bottom of the tube is a standard ping-pong ball with a diameter that is one millimetre smaller than the diameter of the tube. You have the following items at your disposal: * A twelve-inch piece of string * A match * A magnifying glass * A six-inch ruler * A paper clip Aside from the items listed, there is nothing else in the room. Can you find a way to safely retrieve the ping-pong ball without damaging it? The tube cannot be broken nor can it be removed from the cement floor. Hint Answer Did you solve the puzzle? Was it easy? Tell us in the section below!
  3. Wi-Fi Security Finally Gets Its First Major Upgrade in 14 Years We are living in a world in which your kitchen and everyday home appliances can connect to the internet. Which means probably the Wi-Fi devices that provide that access should be using a security protocol that is less than 14 years old. The Wi-Fi Alliance has launched WPA3, a new standard for wireless internet that better encrypts data, making it harder for third parties to intercept that information. Password sign-ins will also offer an extra layer of protection. Beyond that, a program announced in conjunction with WPA3 will make it easier to hook up smart home devices to your Wi-Fi network. Easy Connect will let you use your phone to set up connections that have no display or a minuscule one. The new standard won’t automatically appear on current devices, though. You’ll have to install patches as they’re offered by your manufacturer and some older devices may not receive updates. If you’ve got an older Wi-Fi device, don’t worry, the current standard (WPA2) isn’t going away in the short term. The two protocols are interoperable, though WPA3 will become required over time, according to the Wi-Fi Alliance. The biggest change from WPA2 to WPA3 fixes a huge security flaw that plagued the old system from the start. If someone wanted to access your Wi-Fi device, under WPA2, they had unlimited, unhindered chances to guess your Wi-Fi password. This is an issue even the most basic websites fought head-on years ago, via tech like reCAPTCHA. For hackers who deploy brute force attacks — a method that basically scans through the dictionary, automatically guessing different words and combinations until it cracks your password — this 14-year vulnerability was a gift. Now hackers will have to work much harder to break into your Wi-Fi network. Ostensibly, WPA3 solves this security issue by allowing a single password attempt. If the first try at the password is incorrect, you’ll need to physically interact with the Wi-Fi device. Let’s say a hacker does gain access to your Wi-Fi device. Under WPA2, the unauthorized user had the ability to decrypt any traffic that flowed through, even before they had access to your network. Thanks to WPA3’s support of forward secrecy, this flaw is also rendered obsolete. All traffic from before the breach will remain encrypted to that unauthorized user. And speaking of the Internet of Things — your fridges and toasters that are just as logged-on as you are — WPA3 brings along with it a feature called Wi-Fi Easy Connect. This will make it easier to give appliances that may not have an easy-to-use interface or even a screen access to the internet. With the scan of two QR codes, your vacuum could easily connect to your WPA3-enabled router.
  4. An 'Unbreakable' sequel? The internet is buzzing over M. Night Shyamalan's 'Glass' poster In an era when Marvel is showing everyone how blockbuster franchises are done, it's easy to forget that M. Night Shyamalan built a superhero universe out of nothing. The twist-loving filmmaker's upcoming Glass is due for a major San Diego Comic Con presentation in Hall H — the big room — on July 20. To give fans a taste of what to expect, Shyamalan released the first poster for the Jan. 18, 2019 release on Friday. First, some explanation for those who may not be caught up: On the left and right sides of that image, respectively, we see Samuel L. Jackson's Elijah Price and Bruce Willis's David Dunn, the two stars of Shyamalan's 2000 release, Unbreakable. Then, in the centre, we have James McAvoy's Kevin Wendell Crumb, the main character in Shyamalan's 2016 film, Split. Without getting into heavy spoiler territory — both movies are good, and worth seeing if you've never caught them before — Unbreakable is meant to be an IRL superhero origin story and, by the time credits roll on Split, it's clear that the movie exists within the same universe. This poster for Glass is noteworthy because it ropes all three of these characters together in a way that clearly defines each one's visual motif. Glass is meant to complete the trilogy that started with Unbreakable. The poster reveal was met with enthusiasm all across the internet. Even though Unbreakable is almost 20 years old — and wasn't ever visibly built as the first movie in a series — and Shyamalan's been out of the spotlight since Split's release. There's still a lot of love for this unexpected superhero series.
  5. The mobile Airbag May Be Coming To Save Your Phone What looks like a conventional back-cover is actually a protective equipment which deploys dampers when senses a fall. Among all the precious elements which exist in our daily lives, one of the most important is our smartphone. We may live without air for a day but not without our phones in our hands. Given our rash use of our smartphones, they are highly vulnerable to damages, which may result in losing data as well as money. However, in the coming days, you may stop worrying about it and that can be attributed to a student. The creative and useful accessory has been invented by a mechatronics engineering student named Philip Frenzel who is pursuing his master's degree at Aalen University in Germany. What looks like a conventional back-cover is actually a protective equipment which deploys dampers when senses a fall. Same as that in cars. The cover senses the event of fall with the help of sensors and deploys a set of dampers through springs on all four corners, which absorb the impact. Phillip realised the need for such an equipment when he accidentally dropped his phone and had it severely damaged. Something he started developing for fulfilling the need of protection landed him the National Mechatronics awards for 2018 by German mechatronics society. Once he gets crowdfunding through Kickstarter, he is planning to make it commercially available to the public. Phillip has also filed a patent for the mobile airbag.
  6. uk666

    The Way Things Were

    The Way Things Were People over 45 should be dead. According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 50's, 60's, or even the early 70's probably should not have survived. Here is why: Our baby cribs were covered with bright coloured lead-based paint. We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets. (Not to mention the risks we took hitchhiking.) As children, we would ride in cars with no seatbelts or air bags. Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat. We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. Horrors! We ate cakes, bread and butter, and drank pop with sugar in it, but we were never overweight, because we were always outside playing. We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle, and no one actually died from this. We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem. We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all day. NO CELL PHONES! Unthinkable! We did not have Play Stations, Nintendo's, X-Boxes, no video games at all, no 999 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no personal cell phones, no personal computers, and no Internet. We had friends! We went outside and found them. We fell out of trees, got cut and broke bones and teeth, and there were no lawsuits from these accidents. They were accidents. No one was to blame but us. We had fights and punched each other and got black and blue and learned to get over it. We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes. We rode bikes or walked to a friend's home and knocked on the door, or rang the bell or just walked in and talked to them. Little League had try-outs and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Some students were not as smart as others were, so they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade. Horrors! Tests were not adjusted for any reason. Our actions were our own. Consequences were expected. The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke a law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law. Imagine that! This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers and problem solvers and inventors, ever. The past 70 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.
  7. Seven Annoying and Dangerous Habits of London Pedestrians There are some dangerous pedestrians in London. Walking is not difficult – you look ahead in the direction you are walking, listen to sounds that tell you what is happening nearby, and most importantly you use your common sense. Sadly, there are too many idiots walking dangerously on our footpaths, in shopping centres and railway stations. We just cannot understand why it is so difficult for people to walk intelligently, safely and being aware of other pedestrians. These are the 7 most dangerous and annoying habits we have observed: Keep to the left. This is the convention in this country. Keep the left, particularly when you walk around a corner. We nearly had a collision the other day with an office worker as she turned a corner while carrying her lunch. City Rail has put up signs at Town Hall station saying “Keep Left” but these will be ignored like every other sign including Quiet Carriages. Look to the front, not at your phone. While you walk, look ahead to see where you are going. Don’t look at your phone to read Facebook, browse Instagram, type messages or catch Pokémon. If you must do that, then stop walking. Don’t block your ears with headphones. You need to listen to what is going on around you and not be distracted. We have seen people walking with noise cancelling headphones. This is extremely dangerous! Can you imagine that person walking on to the road, oblivious to oncoming traffic. Save the music listening for your train or bus trip, please! Don’t talk and walk. Another distracted behaviour is the person chatting away on a phone call while walking briskly. Their concentration is on the phone call and not on people nearby. If you need to make a phone call, stop walking and concentrate on your call. Don’t multitask walking and talking. Give way when merging. Just like driving a car, when you join another stream of pedestrian traffic you should give way. Observe other people to avoid a collision. We have often had to avoid pedestrian who quickly leave a shop, completely oblivious to other pedestrians. Don’t suddenly stop. Now that Pokémon Go has become the latest fad. We have to be aware of people, often in pairs, who suddenly stop in the middle of a busy street. Another common behaviour is to suddenly stop to respond to a text message or dial a number. Please can you just wait to use your phone? Don’t use your phone while crossing the street. There are many public awareness campaigns to urge phone-addicted pedestrians to put the phone down while crossing the road. But you can’t stop idiots doing idiotic things. We continue to see people in the city talking on the phone and crossing the road unsafely. This is the same as the 4th habit – Don’t talk and walk.
  8. uk666

    Watering Hole

    Watering Hole A man stopped at his favourite watering hole after a hard day’s work to relax with few beers, before going home. He noticed an unfamiliar man come and sit next to him; the stranger orders a shot and a glass of beer. The stranger drinks the shot, chased it down with the glass of beer and then looked into his shirt pocket. This continued several times before the man’s curiosity got the best of him. He leaned over to the stranger and said, “Excuse me, I couldn’t help but notice your little ritual, why in the world do you look into your shirt pocket every time you drink your shot & beer”? The stranger replied, “There’s a picture of my wife in there, and when she starts lookin’ good’ I’m headin’ home”!
  9. Everything I Need To Know In Life, I Learned From My Cat Life is hard, and then you nap. Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours. When in doubt, cop an attitude. Variety is the spice of life: one day ignore people, the next day annoy them. Climb your way to the top--that is why drapes are there. Never sleep alone when you can sleep on someone's face. Find your place in the sun--especially if it happens to be on that nice pile of warm, clean laundry. Make your mark in the world--or at least spray in each corner. When eating out think nothing of sending back your meal twenty or thirty times If you're not receiving enough attention, try knocking over several expensive antique lamps. Always give generously--a small bird or rodent left on the bed tells them, "I care." When you go out into the world, remember: being placed on a pedestal is a right, not a privilege.
  10. Who is the greatest chicken-killer in Shakespeare.....Macbeth, because he did murder most foul.
  11. Why are circus horses the slowest breed....Because they are taught horses.
  12. Marriage is an institution intended to keep women out of mischief......and get them into trouble.
  13. See here, wait, I've found a button in my salad.....That's all right, sir, it's part of the dressing
  14. Why is a dog like a tree..... Because they both lose their bark once they're dead.
  15. Rotten Tomato Gave John Travolta’s ‘Gotti’ A Zero Percent Gotti features John Travolta in the leading role It joins a small but exclusive list of movies – which include The Ridiculous 6 and Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2 – that have received a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. The website distinguishes whether films are “rotten” or “fresh” based on their reviews but a 0% rating is rare. Variety‘s review of “Gotti” attached near-praise to Travolta’s performance but smeared the film overall. “His performance ain’t lousy, but the movie that surrounds it is, and it’s almost laughable to see this iconic star trying so hard on behalf of a project that is so compromised in its intentions,” writes chief film critic Peter Debruge. In response to its lackluster critical performance, the “Gotti” team released a promotional sizzle reel via Twitter discrediting its skeptics. Reviews from other publications — a sampling of which called the film “a mess” (New York Times), “an offer John Travolta should have refused” (Rolling Stone), and “the worst mob movie ever” (New York Post) — echoed Variety‘s unforgiving sentiments, prompting its marketers to hit back. “Audiences loved ‘Gotti’ but critics don’t want you to see it,” the reel’s Twitter caption reads. “The question is why??? Trust the people and see it for yourself!” But the ploy to save “Gotti” at the box office may be too little, too late, as opening weekend profits peaked at $1.67 million.
  16. Man Makes Brilliant And Funny Signs To Lure Ants Into His Poison Traps Patrick Tobin from Brooklyn recently had some persistent ants loitering around in his apartment. After setting out poison traps for a couple of weeks, he noticed that the insects weren’t really interested in them. “They seem to just walk around them,” he told BuzzFeed News. His solution? He put out some creative and hilarious signs: 1. A miniature strip club – for all those hardworking ants who just want some entertainment after a long day 2. A tiny Blockbuster store. 3. Reading centre. 4. An organic market 5. OK, we have a customer
  17. Wildlife Photographer Captured A Squirrel Wedding And Cute It Is We all know, seeing animals posing for the camera in ‘unnatural’ circumstances is a recipe for both an adorable, and viral, Instagram feed. However, the work of Geert Weggen, a Swedish/Dutch nature photographer is a little more complex than that. Weggen is a world-renowned, award-winning wildlife photographer, working mainly with wild squirrels and birds. His work often captures the eyes of animal lovers around the world due to its whimsical nature. The photos make for delightful viewing and are well worth five minutes of your time. Check out Weggen’s website for more of his work and to see some videos of him in action with the squirrels.
  18. Augmented reality: the most intense weather report you will ever see It’s basically The Weather Channel directed by Michael Bay. Last week, The Weather Channel (TWC) introduced a new augmented reality feature called Immersive Mixed Reality. In their morning show, they rolled out the technology to show what would happen if a tornado hit the studio. In the video below, meteorologist Jim Cantore is seen giving a weather report with a tornado making its way towards him. As the funnel gets stronger, a telephone pole and a car fall mere feet away from the man, nearly crushing him to death. Luckily, for Cantore, it’s all computer-generated. “I watched hours of rehearsals and still flinched when the car dropped from the ceiling,” said Nora Zimmett, senior vice president of content and programming at TWC. Although tornadoes are destructive and deadly, it’s been hard for meteorologists to show how powerful these natural phenomena are through a TV screen. That’s why TWC collaborated up with Norway-based studio The Future Group to create graphics that will really immerse audiences during their broadcasts. According to Mike Chesterfield, director of weather presentation at TWC, he plans to implement the augmented reality tech in 80 percent of their live programming by 2020. “We want to transport our audience into the heart of the weather,” he said.
  19. Bird Watching, Entertaining Illustrated Guide Enjoy looking at things from a different, quirky perspective, which is something that is mirrored a lot in most of the illustrations. 1. Flamingo or Sunburned Swan 2. Cuckatoo or Rebel Dove 3. Kiwi or Baby Bird 4. Swallow or Well Dressed Bird 5. Hummingbird or Ninja Bird 6. Toucan or Taco Bird 7. Pelican or Fruit Punch Goose 8. Mallard or Seabird 9. Crow or Biker Bird 10. Owl or Donut Bird
  20. uk666

    Smart Irishman

    Smart Irishman An Irishman named Murphy went to his doctor after a long illness. The doctor, after a lengthy examination, sighed and looked Murphy in the eye and said, “I’ve some bad news for you… you have cancer and it can’t be cured. I’d give you two weeks to a month.” Murphy, shocked and saddened by the news, but of solid character, managed to compose himself and walk from the doctor’s office into the waiting room. There he saw his son who had been waiting. Murphy said, “Son, we Irish celebrate when things are good and celebrate when things don’t go so well. In this case, things aren’t so well. I have cancer and I’ve been given a short time to live. Let’s head for the pub and have a few pints.” After three or four pints, the two were feeling a little less sober. There were some laughs and more beers. Some of Murphy’s old friends who asked what the two were celebrating eventually approached them. Murphy told them that the Irish celebrate the good and the bad… he went on to tell them that they were drinking to his impending end. He told his friends, “I’ve only got a few weeks to live as I have been diagnosed with AIDS.” The friends gave Murphy their condolences and they had a couple more beers. After his friends left, Murphy’s son leaned over and whispered, “Dad, I thought you said that you were dying from cancer. You just told your friends that you were dying from AIDS!” Murphy said, “I am dying from cancer, son, I just don’t want any of them sleeping with your mother after I’m gone.”
  21. The Winners Of The Nature Conservancy Photo Contest Were Announced, And Some Of Them Will Make You Think The Nature Conservancy is 'the leading conservation organization working around the world to protect ecologically important lands and waters for nature and people." Every year they hold a competition where professional and amateur photographers from all around the globe can submit their photos, and this year the organization has just announced the 21 winning photographs of 2018. There are 6 categories in this competition: People and nature. Landscape. Water. Wildlife. Cities and nature. People’s choice. From 135 countries, more than 57k pictures submitted, and below you can see the 10 best. More info: nature org
  22. Heavenly Justice Once, there was a preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he would be on the golf course swinging away. It was a kind of an obsession with him. One Sunday was a picture-perfect day for golfing. The sun was out, no clouds were in the sky, and the temperature was just right. The preacher was in a quandary as to what to do, but the urge to play golf overcame him. He called an assistant to tell him that he was sick and could not do church, packed the car up, and drove three hours to a golf course, where he hoped no one would recognize him. Very happily, he began to play the course. An angel up above, was watching the preacher and was quite upset. He went to God and said, “Look at this preacher. He should be punished for what he is doing.” God nodded in agreement. The preacher teed up on the first hole. He swung at the ball, and it sailed effortlessly through the air and landed right in the cup 250 yards away. A picture-perfect hole-in-one. It never happen before. He was shocked and excited at the same time. The angel was surprised and he turned to God and said, “I beg your pardon, you have just rewarded him with a hole-in-one.” God smiled and replied. “Think about it, who can he tell…?”
  23. uk666

    Furiously

    Furiously One day a student was taking a very difficult essay exam. At the end of the test, the prof asked all the students to put their pencils down and immediately hand in their tests papers. But one young man kept writing furiously, although he was warned that if he did not stop immediately he would be disqualified. He ignored the warning, finished the test 10 minutes later, and went to hand the test paper to the instructor. The instructor told him; sorry he cannot hand in his test paper. The student asked, “Do you know who I am?” The prof said, “No and I don’t care.” The student asked again, “Are you sure you don’t know who I am?” The prof again said no. The student walked over to the pile of tests papers. He placed his paper in the middle of the pile. Then he threw all the tests papers in the air and quickly departed.
  24. Cutting Links Puzzle A jeweller is asked to join four small 3-link chains (shown) into a large circular 12-link chain. In order to join two closed links, one of the links needs to be cut, placed onto the other link, and then closed. The clever jeweller finds a creative way to make the circular chain while cutting as few links as possible. How many links does he cut and what does he do? Hint Answer Did you solve the puzzle? Was it easy? Tell us in the section below!
  25. uk666

    Fourth Husband

    Fourth Husband A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the Fourth time. "How wonderful! But I hope you don't mind me asking what happened to your first husband?" "He ate poisonous mushrooms and died." "Oh, how tragic! What about your second husband?" "He ate poisonous mushrooms too and died." "Oh, how terrible! I'm almost afraid to ask you about your third husband." "He died of a broken neck." "A broken neck?" "He wouldn't eat the mushrooms."
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