uk666 5,298 Report post Posted February 18, 2017 Golf Quotes If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron. Lee Trevino Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps. Tiger Woods Golf is deceptively simple and endlessly complicated; it satisfies the soul and frustrates the intellect. It is at the same time rewarding and maddening - and it is without a doubt the greatest game mankind has ever invented. Arnold Palmer Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing. Dave Barry Success in golf depends less on strength of body than upon strength of mind and character. Arnold Palmer The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody put a flagstick on top. Pete Dye. Winning isn't everything, but wanting it is. Arnold Palmer Eighteen holes of match play will teach you more about your foe than 18 years of dealing with him across a desk. Grantland Rice If profanity had an influence on the flight of the ball, the game of golf would be played far better than it is. Horace G. Hutchinson Man blames fate for other accidents, but feels personally responsible when he makes a hole in one. Unknown It’s good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling. Mark Twain Don’t play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty. Harry Vardon Golf and sex are the only things you can enjoy without being good at them. Jimmy DeMaret May thy ball lie in green pastures – and not in still waters. Unknown The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can’t improve your lie. George Deukmejian Golf appeals to the idiot and the child in us. Just how childlike golfers become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five. John Updike It is almost impossible to remember how tragic a place the world is when one is playing golf. Robert Lynd They say golf is like life, but don’t believe them. Golf is more complicated than that. Gardner Dickinson If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they’d starve to death. Sam Snead Golf is a day spent in a round of strenuous idleness. William Wordsworth The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has. Will Rogers If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt. Dean Martin If you are going to throw a club, it is important to throw it ahead of you, down the fairway, so you don’t have to waste energy going back to pick it up. Tommy Bolt I don’t say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes – they’d come up sliced. Unknown My handicap? Woods and irons. Chris Codiroli The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flagstick on top. Pete Dye I’m hitting the woods just great – but having a terrible time getting out of them! Unknown The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course. Billy Graham If you think it’s hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf ball. Jack Lemmon If I hit it right, it’s a slice. If I hit it left, it’s a hook. If I hit it straight, it’s a miracle. Unknown Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an ever smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose Winston S. Churchill. Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe. Unknown If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf. Bob Hope 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites