27 Old Adult Truths

[uk666 5,298]

27 Old Adult Truths

1. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning joined-up handwriting really necessary?

7. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind-of tired.

10. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

15. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

16. The first testicular guard, the ⤽Cup," was used in Hockey in 1874 and the first helmet was used in 1974. That means it only took 100 years for men to realize that their brain is also important. Life just gets better as you get older, doesn't it?

17. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option.

18. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

19. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

20. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

21. Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.

22. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time.

23. As soon as you find something at the grocery store that you really like, they will either move it or the company will discontinue it.

24. The driving of all the other people on the road has become markedly worse in the past few years.

25. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

26. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate bicyclists.

27. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Crap!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

And lastly:

I was in a Starbucks Coffee recently when my stomach started rumbling and I realised that I desperately needed to pass gas.

The place was packed but the music was really loud so to get relief and reduce embarrassment I timed my releases to the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel much better. I finished my coffee and noticed that everyone was staring at me.

I suddenly remembered that I was listening to my iPod with headphones.... and how was your day???

[Rædwulf 1,441]

53 minutes ago, uk666 said:

 

15. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

yes yes a must.. luv it haha..