uk666 5,298 Report post Posted November 3, 2018 Damn good definitions..... ADULTERY - The wrong people doing the right thing.ALIMONY - The screwing you get for the screwing you got.BABY - A hollow tube with a loud voice at one end and a complete lack of responsibility at the other end.CANNIBAL - One who is apt to pass his best friend.CHIVALRY - A man's inclination to defend a woman against every man but himself.CONSCIENCE - That which hurts when everything else feels so good.CONSTIPATION - To have and to hold.COOKIE - A virgin doughnut.DANCE - A naval engagement without the loss of seamen.DIVORCE - What happens when two people cannot stomach each other any longer.DECOY - A flashlight in the pants pocket.DIARY - Book of revelations.DOCTOR - A lucky fellow who is privileged to undress women and go all over them without getting his face slapped.ENEMA - A goose with a gush.EXPLORATION - Beating around the bush.FATHER'S DAY - Nine months before labour day.GENTLEMAN - One who is always careful to rest at least half his weight on his elbows.GIGGALO - The egg that laid the golden goose.GLAMOUR GIRL - A much publicized young thing who is full of oomf, and frequently full of other things; one who doesn't worry about the meat shortage.HORSE SHOW - A lot of horses showing their asses to a lot of horses' asses showing their horses.HUSBAND - What is left after the nerve has been killed.KEPT WOMAN - One who wears mink all day and fox all night.HUNG CHOW - Chinese constipation.A KISS - Upper persuasion for lower invasion. Upstairs shopping for downstairs merchandise.M*STURBATION - A solo played on a private organ.METALLURGIST - A man who can look at a platinum blonde and tell whether she is virgin metal or a common ore.MINUTE MAN - One who double parks while he visits a sporting house.MORNING - The time of day when the rising generation retires, and the retiring generation arises.MOTHER'S DAY - Nine months after father's day.DONKEY BARBECUE - Where everybody gets a piece of ass.NUN - A woman who aren’t never had none, don't want any, and aren’t going to get none.NURSE - A pan handler.NURSERY - A place to park last year’s fun until it grows up a bit.PAPOOSE - Consolation prize for taking a chance on an Indian blanket.PIMP - A crack salesman; a nookie bookie.PREGNANCY - When a woman is all swelled up from her mate's handiwork.RHUMBA - An asset to music.SECRETARY - A stenographer who watches her periods.SIN - Anything the other fellow enjoys and you don't.SISSY - A man who gets out of the bath tub to take a leak.SPRING FEVER - When the iron in your blood turns to lead in your pencil.STORK - The bird that had none of the fun in bringing the babies.TAXIDERMIST - A man who mounts animals.TOMCAT - A ball bearing mouse trap.TRIPLETS - Having to take seriously what was poked at you in fun.VISE - Anything you enjoy that is bad for you.VIRGINITY - A bubble on the stream of life, one prick and it's gone forever.VIRGIN WOOL - Wool from a sheep that can outrun a sheep herder. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites