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Is it stolen A man goes into a store and starts looking around. He sees a washer & dryer but there is no price listed on them. He asks a salesman who says, Five dollars for both of them. Yeah right, you've got to be shitting me! the man says. No, that's the price, do you want to buy them or not, the salesman says. Yeah, I'll take them, the man says. The man continues to look around and he sees a car stereo system with a detachable face cassette player, a CD changer, amplifier, speakers. How much? He asks. one dollar for the system, the sales guy says. Is it stolen? The guy asks incredulously. No, says the salesman and it’s brand new, do you want it or not? Sure, the guy says. He looks around some more. As the salesperson is ringing up the purchases, the man asks him, why are your prices so cheap? The salesman says, well, the owner of the store is at my house right now with my wife and what he's doing to her.... is what I'm doing to his business!

Anniversary Party Ole and Lena were celebrating their twenty-fifth anniversary. After the guests left, Lena looked at Ole and punched him real hard in the shoulder. “That’s for twenty-five years of bad sex.” Ole thinks about it and then reaches over and Punches Lena hard in her shoulder. “That’s for knowing the difference!”

When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car or the wife is new.

Man is incomplete until he is married.....then he is really finished.

Godsmack - Bulletproof (Director's Cut) Connect with Godsmack Website: http://godsmack.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Godsmack/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/godsmack Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/godsmack/ Director - Troy Smith Producer - Jacquelyn Frisco

what to say to a woman.. don't say anything.. ur perfect just the way u r..

Why did the banana go to the doctor……Because he wasn't peeling well!

How did the Irish Jig get started……Too much Guinness and not enough bathrooms

Did you hear about the old vampire who kept his teeth in the freezer......He gave his victims frostbite!

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice container?...... It said concentrate!